(Missed) Redang Trip

I am such a faggot. I can't believe I use such a title.

Anyway, yeah, this is basically a post of doubt. Yeah, I initialy wanted to put sadness and regret but I find that those two aren't really the appropriate word.

I am still wondering, why on earth did I not take a leave to join my friends in a fun-filled trip. Not to say I am feeling utterly despaired, I think I sort of became immune to it because there are other things that actually made me feel even worse.

For example, I really hate it when people keep stuff away from me. I am quite sure I made this quite clear often enough, but I think being ole' me, no one thinks its serious. Yes, be it from secondary school friends or college mates.

Gah!! Enough of that long-winded sad sounding post, I actually wanted to write what I did instead of going to Redang, which is.....

Attending TRAINING at BDO

Not to say which is better or worse, but I believe whenever a choice needs to be made, the resulting feeling of "why did I not" definitely comes back to haunt you.

Ok, time for the truth, I know if i try this IRL, I will be beaten up, so, here is the truth for you. Actually, I was more sadden on these few occasions. First of all, it is during World Cup, when I read Chun Tean's facebook status about you guys going to Lesan's house to watch one of the match, I was sliced to pieces because I am not sure how many of you people, my friends, know that I hate gangs. Heck, sooner or later, I think my only connection to you (5Sc1) is going for 'pai nin' at everyone's house and ta-da. End of story!!! To be truthful, I will really cry when I realised that happen, in the future, if it did happen.
Another thing, I always feel disconnected. I have no idea when it started but 5Sc1, please please please make me feel connected. again. Although I know, it is my loss, not yours. The verdict is really up to you. I mean, where had all the happy times gone to? Hell or heaven? For eternity? No way!! Fuck that!! I want the happy times to stay in our memory and better still, we create even more happy future.

Ah, I feel much better now. XD, I really like to rant and cray, too bad I can't do this at work, lest I be chased away by my senior right now. Just 2 more months and few more days!